To Here and Back Again

[TheRecoveredVet]

Hello everyone. Its certainly been awhile since I've last graced these forums. Over 7 years to be exact. Some of you might remember me, but I used to go by the name A Knothole Resident. Back during my forum-posting days, I considered this place like a second home. A community where I felt welcomed with people that shared my passion for this obscure aspect of the Sonic franchise. Unfortunately, there were times where my attitude soured and egotism consumed me to the point of verbal attacks and drama baiting. All because of opinions that I wasnt mature enough to handle. I look back and acknowledge how much unwarranted turmoil I caused over something as petty as a video game character. What I did, how I acted, and dealt with these issues were beyond deplorable, and I sincerely apologize for that phase in my life. I was a completely different person then, as I am now. Its strange what the passage of time can do, and how much a person can evolve to where they admit their mistakes. Its not an easy task, but its a huge burden lifted once you come to terms with them.

So youre probably wondering. What happened to me and why I have returned? Well, Ill give you the abridged version. After pulling the plug on my Sonic Fan Film in early 2011, I disconnected myself from all online fan bases. Basically weening away from forums, chatrooms, and even online messengers. I started focusing more on my career and branching out my social life. I worked full time at a major corporation, freelanced on the side, and even took up film making. Nothing major, just shooting short comedy skits and a run a short lived music review show. It was a refreshing direction on my life cause I actually felt a sense of accomplishment while genuinely enjoying what I was doing. These days, I made another advancement by quitting the corporate world and venturing out on my own as a full time freelancer, where I can finally be involved in projects I'm passionate about.

Now whats this have to do with Sonic? Well during my initial "disconnect" I kinda fell outta the loop with the franchise. It wasnt around till 2015 where my interest was somewhat rekindled. I picked up the comics again. I played through the back catalogue of recent Sonic games (Colors being the last since). Revisited Sonic News sites to see what I was missing out on. Even watched the Sonic Boom cartoon which was honestly entertaining. The more I got back into the mix of things, the more I realized that SEGA in general has drastically changed this decade. Im really digging their self-aware and satirical poke at their own flaws. Embracing memes and such. Its honestly charming to see this playful side of them.

Flash to 2016. This was the year Sonic reeled me back in. I attended Comic Con that year and went to the Sonic 25th Anniversary Party. My friends and I had a blast and we all wanted to go since it was a milestone event and something that represented my childhood. It was like all those endearing memories of having civil discussions on all those Sonic boards from the 90s/early 00s came surging back. I wanted a night to relive those nostalgic moments. But the one thing that solidified my interest in Sonic again, was the announcement of Sonic Mania. From that point, I found myself bookmarking Sonic fan sites again. Playing Sonic games and feeling that sense of excitement reading any Sonic News.

2017. The childhood dream becomes a reality. A Sonic the Hedgehog movie is confirmed to be in development. It seemed that everything I wanted from this franchise was actually improving and the movie announcement was the cherry on top. The games were better. The cartoons were engaging. There was a NEW comic book. The official movie, without drama or rug-pulling was legitimately happening. It seemed like right now is the perfect time to be a Sonic fan and it's strange to say that I feel like a kid again with all the positivity coming from the franchise and the fanbase.

So then a couple days ago, I started google searching old Sonic sites for the purpose of reminiscing about the golden years of Sonic communities. SonicHQ, FUS, Sonic Stadium, here. Its like returning home after many years. The home being the way it was when I left while the neighbors made some cosmetic changes to the architecture. Seriously, I had no clue that SonicHQ and the others mentioned sitll existed.

Best most of all, Its great to see that a lot of familiar people are still here, proving that the true fans will stick around no matter the circumstances. I realize that Archie Comics are no longer in the running, signifying the death of SatAM. Its depressing, but I think as long as there are people like you guys who still remember this way past cool show and its comic counterpart, it will never die.

Phew, I didnt mean for this to be a novel but I when you've disappeared into a void for nearly a decade, you tend to ramble. Anyway, its great to be back and hope you guys are willing to forgive the past and move forward with the future

[Lynchenberg]

Considering that novel, I get the sense that you're still at a very unhealthy place with all of this.

[TheRecoveredVet]

What makes you say that?

[Lynchenberg]

You just seem really desperate to convince us that you've changed, and in my experience (I've had more experience with mentally ill people in my life than I'd care to admit) when someone is desperate to convince others that they've changed, it's a sign that they haven't. Especially when it's to the point of writing paragraph after paragraph about how healthy they are now; telling everyone what they think they want to hear ("I love where the Sonic franchise is now, A-plus perfect, I'm not that guy who went off on every little thing back in the day!").

I think if you'd truly changed, you would no longer feel the need to be here at all, let alone make a new account without mentioning that you were banned (were you allowed back?). I think the fact you aren't mentioning the banning and the creation of a new account is a sign you don't want people knowing the full extent of your issues, as making yet another sock account (albeit once you're open about now) is evidence that those issues remain. I don't know. I'm not saying you're a bad person or you're not wanted here or anything like that. It just seems like you're still too obsessed with Sonic (or rather, the time in your childhood Sonic represents), and you're using huge paragraphs like girls use concealer.

[TheRecoveredVet]

Well, that's a loaded assumption. Considering that I haven't been here in nearly a decade, I felt compelled to play "catch up" with those who might remember me. I don't see the problem in providing an explanation of my whereabouts and return. I've read other lengthy "return" posts from former members similar to mine, so I'm perplexed on why you're being antagonist.

[Lynchenberg]

A sudden burst of anger when you're questioned; that's another red flag. Look, I may be wrong; I hope I am. But you'd be on this carousel so, so many times now...can you see why people would be skeptical? If you have changed, I should think you would.

[TheRecoveredVet]

Burst of anger lol? Now youre just gaslighting. Whatever, great to be back everyone

[Lynchenberg]

"Gaslighting," nice word choice. It's defined as using psychological manipulation to make someone question their memory, which is pretty damn hard to do on an internet thread where everything that's been said is there in perpetuity. But sure, that's absolutely what I did when I pointed out that I upset you. Tell me champ, did you just hear someone toss that big boy word out during a group therapy session? If so, I'm glad you're at least getting the help that you need.

Also, while we're at it, want to to address the banning question? Were you allowed back or is this yet another sock account? If you were allowed back, why aren't you on your old account?

I know I sound mean Richard, but for what it's worth, I truly do hope I'm wrong and you ARE at a healthy place with all this. I don't have anything personal against you. It's just...given your history and the fact that you even remember this place anymore after a decade, let alone the fact you're still trying to sneak back in...you CAN see my point-of-view, right?

[TheRecoveredVet]

I'm not using my old handle cause it represents a chapter of my life I moved on from. Im honestly embarrassed about my immature behavior cause the person back then is a farcry of who I am today.

I'm not that 20 something obsessed Sonic fanatic that lives on forums and makes rant videos. Though judging from your crass yet condescending reply, you apparently still think I am. Its not fair to berate someone for something that happened years ago in the past when they've learned from their mistakes.

Regardless if its been 7 years, I still have fond memories of this place. Its why I chose this board in particular to re-register since so much in the world of Sonic has happened recently that garnered my interest again.

The concise answer. People change.

[PorpoiseMuffins]

Hey Rich. Hope you are in a better place, as you say. No hard feelings

[Lynchenberg]

I'm not using my old handle cause it represents a chapter of my life I moved on from. Im honestly embarrassed about my immature behavior cause the person back then is a farcry of who I am today.

I'm not that 20 something obsessed Sonic fanatic that lives on forums and makes rant videos. Though judging from your crass yet condescending reply, you apparently still think I am. Its not fair to berate someone for something that happened years ago in the past when they've learned from their mistakes.

Regardless if its been 7 years, I still have fond memories of this place. Its why I chose this board in particular to re-register since so much in the world of Sonic has happened recently that garnered my interest again.

The concise answer. People change.

Funny. I brought it up with another admin and he said the only reason he didn't bother re-banning you (yet again, this is far from your first post-banning account) is because this is a dead forum so there's no chaos for you to stir up. Honestly though, you stirring up drama is not what concerns me, I'm more concerned for your own well-being.

Here's the thing Richard. I do believe people can change and we've all made mistakes. But when someone truly changes, they don't feel the need to announce it and try to settle back into their old niches. They just change and look to the future, not behind them. Look, I'm not trying to be high and mighty here. I've been an a****** in my life, I've done things I'm ashamed of, but I changed. And because I've changed, I'm not going to go back to the people I've hurt and try to convince them I'm normal now and squeeze my way back into their lives. If I was doing that, they'd be correct in assuming that I haven't changed, because even contacting them again to apologize would not be for them, it would be entirely self-serving.

I think if you were truly past this all, you'd be able to just let it go at age thirty-seven. But one thing I've learned is that I can't save people, and if the main admin has decided you're welcome back, well...knock yourself out buddy; the trolls have tired of you and there's essentially no one here for you to upset. And as for me, well, I just use this site as a place to take a s***, so whatever.

[TheRecoveredVet]

Hey Rich. Hope you are in a better place, as you say. No hard feelings

Now that's a familiar name I havent seen in years Great to know that youre still around. Whether certain people have old grudges against me (which is understandable), I honestly appreciate your forgiveness. It's difficult to shake off past turmoil when the internet immortalizes it, but removing myself from it for several years was a major benefit.

[PorpoiseMuffins]

Honestly, I don't remember what happened And it's not really relevant now. At this point in my life, Internet forum drama no longer consumes much space in my mind.

But when someone truly changes, they don't feel the need to announce it and try to settle back into their old niches. They just change and look to the future, not behind them.

All very valid points, and this time may be the same as every other one before. But it has been a long time, so maybe just see how it goes?

And as for me, well, I just use this site as a place to take a s***, so whatever.

Nice

[TheRecoveredVet]

Honestly, I don't remember what happened And it's not really relevant now. At this point in my life, Internet forum drama no longer consumes much space in my mind.

Its a blank to me as well, but I am curious. Was I banned? All I remember was leaving all Sonic boards after I released that scene from the fan film. Once that was posted, I just...vanished

But wow, I feel like Ive woken up from a cryo sleep since it was only recently I started reading up on Sonic news that wasnt casual game ads I saw on social media. The Freedom Fighters went through a massive redesign? Sally was a robot? Archie Comics were cancelled and IDW picked up the torch? Tangle the Lemur? Sonic Mania became the most successful Sonic game to date? A Sonic movie is actually happening and it stars Jim Carry as Robotnik? What even is all this lol?

I guess it proves that once a Sonic fan, always a Sonic fan

[Lynchenberg]

And as for me, well, I just use this site as a place to take a s***, so whatever.

Nice

Absolutely. Has anything I've posted in the last...God, at least five years now...led you to believe otherwise?

Its a blank to me as well, but I am curious. Was I banned? All I remember was leaving all Sonic boards after I released that scene from the fan film. Once that was posted, I just...vanished

But wow, I feel like Ive woken up from a cryo sleep since it was only recently I started reading up on Sonic news that wasnt casual game ads I saw on social media. The Freedom Fighters went through a massive redesign? Sally was a robot? Archie Comics were cancelled and IDW picked up the torch? Tangle the Lemur? Sonic Mania became the most successful Sonic game to date? A Sonic movie is actually happening and it stars Jim Carry as Robotnik? What even is all this lol?

I guess it proves that once a Sonic fan, always a Sonic fan

Don't worry about it. Kevin Spacey forgets stuff too.

Tell me, did you remember the 2015 apology though? The one where you jizzed over a ten-year-old girl getting hit by a car and killed because it meant someone who was mean to you on the internet went to jail?

Hi guys, its me. The assclown from the video. Its been a long time hasn't it? Nearly 5 years to be exact. Im still in awe how I posted this atrocity and thought at one point of my life, that it was actually a good idea. But shortly after, I promptly removed it but was immediately uploaded to this troll account which to this day eternally broadcasts my past failures. In hindsight, I dont know WTF I was thinking with this, but perhaps I can shed some light on the subject matter. At the time, I was still an obsessive Sonicfan brat that thrived on Sonic related message boards. Constantly hounding for attention and projecting outlandish claims on why my sub-division of a franchise was more superior. Yeah, immature internet drama. You can could say I was delusional, or perhaps an insane egocentric douche. I prefer all of the above cause watching this half a decade later, is surreal to me. Not cause it still exists, but how its like watching a completely different person. Anyway, I thought it would appropriate to inform you guys on what my status is and how the last couple years have panned out for me.'

First off, lets address the user SegaKoolAid. Such a delightful individual that invested his leisure harassing and crank calling people. But you know what they say, karma is a bitch and he got what deserved. For those who are unaware, he was arrested in 2012 for vehicular manslaughter, serving a 15 year jail sentence. How did it happen? Drunk driving and rear ending a vehicle instantly killing a 10 year old girl. LOL and you guys thought I had baggage.

As for me, I officially left the Sonic community in early 2011 and pretty much disconnected myself from online fan bases in general. The only venues I post at are either facebook, twitter, deviantart, and tumblr. Nothing outside of my personal networks basically. I wouldn't say I became more reserved, but more social and extroverted. Basically, getting my life back together. I moved out of my moms, I landed a successful career, and became much more active in a myriad of activities. Even though people will still flock to this video and post insulting comments, understand that said video does not reflect the person who I am in 2015. With that said, I hope I added some clarity since I honestly do regret ever filming this s***.

Very self-aware. Not.